The Substitute
by KricketWilliams
Summary: A substitute is very nice, but never the real thing.
1. Chapter 1

_AN: As usual, a new idea popped up after I watched "100." However, it took a few days of blubbering before I could really attack the keyboard! LOL. _

"I am sorry, but to look that good in jeans should be illegal," JJ said under her breath to Em and Garcia, standing near the doorway of her office.

"Mmm hmm," was all Prentiss could respond.

Penelope smiled, a sly little half smile. It was shameful to ogle coworkers, but they really couldn't help it. He was truly a fine specimen of manhood. He was so handsome, he was almost pretty! Besides, as long as they talked low amongst each other, no one would ever know.

As if he could sense the staring, he looked up from his conversation with Reid to the doorway where they were standing and shot them a wink. Busted! All three ladies stiffened, blushed a little, and scurried back to their respective spots.

It had been nearly a month since Agent Monroe joined the team, interim for Hotch while he recovered from the tragedy that shook the entire BAU. There was no doubt that he was going to need a lot of time to recover. The whole team needed time to sit back and lick their wounds. Unfortunately, serial killers kept killing, horrors kept needing to be analyzed., files needed to be researched. Life just wouldn't slow down for them.

Alex was smart and stable. He was an agent for the DEA before he started working of the FBI. He was very kind, too. He always was the first person to say hello, the first person to bring donut or something nice in the morning for them all to share. It was as if he could feel the palpable grief that the team recently went through, and he wanted to help heal them. He never tried to replace Hotch, just listened and helped with whatever he could do. He knew his position was temporary until Hotch got back.

Penelope thought of when he first walked in the doorway to the bullpen. She nearly dropped the papers she was carrying. Morgan was introducing him to Emily. He was a tall, blonde, blue-eyed, dimpled chin, stunning hunk of burnin' love. She hoped the shocked look on her face was gone, because Derek brought him her way next.

"Garcia, this is Agent Alex Monroe. He's going to be helping here while Hotch is on sabbatical."

Before she could say a word, Reid popped up from his desk. "Sabbatical usually means a year or so leave. Is that how long Hotch says he's going to be gone?" The entire team felt their collective hearts plummet. They needed Hotch; he was family. There was no denying it; they were frightened. Not being a family for a year!

"It's day by day, Reid," Morgan said, and a collective sigh of relief was heard. "We don't know how long it's going to be. That's just what Strauss is calling it. He needs to take his time."

Everyone looked at Derek, glad that he was leading, glad that he was remaining so strong in this turmoil. Then Garcia remembered that she was being introduced to a new member of the team, and everyone looked like they were meeting the grim reaper! Looking at Agent Monroe, Garcia extended her hand, a warm smile on her face. "Pleased to meet you. I'm Penelope."

"Thank you for that," he said. His eyes were understanding. "It's okay. I know this is hard for everyone, but I do feel welcome. You're a tech analyst?" She nodded her affirmative, and he added, "Then we are going to be very good friends, because I don't know squat about computers."

She smiled up at him, "Number two on the speed dial, sweetheart."

She floored him. She could tell that she did. Then she realized, the endearment just slipped out. Maybe she should apologize? She didn't have much time to consider, because he just grinned back a double dimpled smile. "Thanks, angel face. I appreciate it."

After that, it was open season for flirting with Alex. He was funny, he was sweet. He was an equal opportunity flirter with JJ, Pen, and Em, but flirted the most with Penelope over the phone. After all, a teaser knows a fellow teaser! He loved to joke around with Reid too. They needed that lightness again, something to laugh about in this dark job. He was a welcome addition, that was for sure.

She was having a lot of fun again. It had been such a long time since she flirted, a long time since she laughed. She glanced down the hall at the office near the end of her hallway, the office of SSA Morgan. Her smile dimmed and her heart tightened, more than she wanted it to.

Yeah, lots of fun.

He was almost as good as the real thing.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_AN: Trust me, he won't stay like this! Needed to know what was going on in his head...._

"Hey, sugar, what can I do you for?" Penelope purred in the phone.

"Baby girl," Derek said, smiling into the conference phone. It had been awhile since she answered him that way, and it felt good to hear it.

"Derek?" she questioned slowly. "I didn't think it was you."

He sat back in the conference room in the field office in Minneapolis, Minnesota, and glanced around the table at the other agents. Alex smirked; JJ, Emily and Reid all were trying to look anywhere but at Derek. Emily was the first to meet his glance, and she actually looked at him sympathetically.

_What the hell? _Derek thought. So, Garcia was flirting with the new guy. No big deal. Garcia, still his baby girl, was just a flirt. That stuff never meant anything to her. He was too busy and serious to have a chance to do that anymore, but if he did, she'd go back to flirting with him in a heartbeat. She would.

Nothing changed between them, really. Yeah, it irked that Garcia didn't know it was him, but it was beyond annoying to have the general looks of pity coming his way.

"That's okay, Garcia. We need you to look up anything you have on Northwest airline tickets purchased between hub travel cities of Memphis and Minneapolis within the last two days." He did the briefing just like the boss would, because that was what he was.

"Sure thing, sir," she said, sounding like she was talking to Hotch. "Garcia out!"

"What a woman!" Alex said, smiling so that a dimple showed on each side of his perfect mouth. The rest of the team just smiled, except for Derek. Then they were all joking around with each other, good humor in this serious job, except for Derek.

At the end, as the agents were leaving, he saw Monroe flip open his phone and dial someone. "Hey, sweet momma, I need you to…"

Alright. Now, he knew he had to admit it. Something was bothering him. He was sure what it was, but he didn't want to put a finger on it. It was just bugging the crap out of him, but he wasn't going to say it. It didn't make any sense.

Really, he liked Agent Monroe, he was a nice guy. They had a lot in common, both were huge sports fans, athletic, and had quick senses of humor. He even wore the same style of Levi's that Derek used to wear. He was a self-admitted player, like Derek used to be. He seemed like a decent guy. Nothing not to like.

So why did he want to kick his ass half the time?

Derek growled and grabbed the rest of his paperwork. He let out a frustrated sigh. He looked at his phone and seriously thought about calling Garcia and asking her to just call him once in a while, just to keep up on the cases…

He shook his head. He was lying to himself. He just wanted her to call and be a friend again. He was so fucking lonely. He knew she had his back and he had hers, he knew she loved him and he loved her, but right now, all the changes made him uncertain. He wanted to hear her quick intake of breath when he flirted with her, to feel the chemistry that just flowed between them. It was different after Lynch, different after Tamara, but this now..... There just wasn't much laughter anymore. He didn't want to lose that. It was beyond important to him, but he felt it slipping through his fingers.

He thought back to the conversation that just happened and winced. _Sir? _Did she actually call him _sir? _Penelope who wanted to see him in chaps, his princess who asked if he would spank her if she was naughty, his baby girl who always gave good "phone" to him, called him "_sir_."

He felt about eighty years old. He looked out the hall and saw Agent Monroe, leaning against the wall, smiling and talking on his phone. Even his posture was relaxed. Derek was tense, pissed, and his shoulders were stiff. There was nothing he could do about it, either. He couldn't call Tamara, she wouldn't understand. He couldn't exactly talk to Reid, Em, or JJ. He didn't usually discuss this kind of stuff with them- he didn't have that kind of bond like he did with someone else.

No, the one person he would call to lighten up this crappy mood was already talking to Alex Monroe.

He was absolutely ticked now, because for the first time in his life, Derek felt sorry for himself.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

_AN: I forget to say in the first chapter that I don't own diddly squat. Can anyone tell me: Do I have to do that, or is it a given?_

"Hey beautiful," Alex said, walking into Penelope's office, bearing two cappuccinos.

"Hey yourself, handsome," she said, accepting the coffee gratefully. She was tired; the clean up from the last case was absolutely brutal. She was encrypting the files and had about five hours left. Still, it was worth taking a break with Alex. "What brings you to my neck of the woods?"

"Pure animal instinct said to come here and mark my territory," he grinned at her, perfect white teeth flashing. "Claim you as mine."

She laughed. He really was an insufferable tease. He made her feel special again. It had been a long time since she felt special to anyone. Unfortunately, it was bittersweet. The person she wanted to feel special to didn't seem to give a damn anymore. So serious, so stifled… so not himself. She couldn't help it; her eyes glanced down the hall towards Derek's office.

If anything, Alex was very perceptive. He watched the play of emotions on Penelope's face, saw where she was looking, and he didn't like it. She was unhappy, he could tell. Out of all the people in the BAU, Penelope was the one that he had become closest to. She opened her heart wide to him, was good and kind, and was genuinely concerned for him. She was pretty and a bit chubby. Not what most would consider a "classic beauty."

But something about her just made her glow, far beyond anyone else in the bureau. It was her caring, her eagerness to please, and her remaining innocence in an area where others were so jaded. God, he loved his time that he spent with her. He started to wonder if anyone else in the world had that sparkle?

Then he frowned. That inner radiance was really dampened now. And it had something to do with that man down the hall.

Alex knew it. He could feel the palpable tension between the boss and Penelope. She would joke with him, but then look over to see if Morgan noticed. She would mention Morgan about every ten minutes in a conversation. "Oh, Derek used to" this or "Ha! That's what Derek would" do. And it was almost always "Derek." Not "Agent Morgan" or "the boss." It was "Derek," said with love.

Alex wasn't the kind to pussyfoot. He hated when people kept things bottled up. It wasn't good for digestion. So, he spoke very plainly to Penelope. "How long have you been in love with him?"

Penelope quickly looked back at Monroe and flushed a little. She was so flippin' transparent sometimes, it made her mad. She decided to play dumb to avoid answering questions that she didn't want to answer. "Kevin? I've been off and on with him for three years, but not really serious. Off right now…"

She had to stop. Monroe was looking at her, one brow arched (Reminded her of Derek, yet again. How could they tell a story by just arching their brows?) He knew. There was no hiding it. "We're just friends," she said, then she sighed.

"Not for you, though, right?"

"I just miss him, who he was not so long ago." Her eyes had tears in them, then she laughed a little. "Funny, you remind me so much of him. He used to be just like-"

"I know. Emily and JJ told me that the similarities are eerie," he laughed. "Except our looks. I didn't think the world could handle more than one of me!" She nodded, giggling, and he smiled more. He sobered up again before he continued. "So, someday, sweet lady, you think you could look at me like that?"

"Like what?"

He put his fingertips under her chin and smiled into her eyes. "With your entire heart in your eyes, loving me."

"I… I…" she looked down, and her heart just wrenched from her chest. Here, one of the most handsome, kind men she ever had the great fortune of meeting, was begging for her attention, and her heart had an "no vacancy" sign blinking.

She met his eyes again. "It's so stupid," she whispered softly. "He said he loved me, and I said I loved him, too. We always were there for each other for so long. Friends."

"Oh, Pen-" he started, but she interrupted.

"It's my fault. I ran. I was scared. Instead of telling him how I meant it, I ran. He doesn't have a clue," she said, so sadly.

Alex harrumphed. "Then he's a blind ass, Penelope. One look at you, and I knew- there's love there. More than a friend. I am suspecting that he feels more too.."

"But we never even kissed," she said, some confusion on her face.

He leaned forward, and put his hands on the armrests of her chair. "Neither have we, but that doesn't deny that I want you," he smiled at the quick intake of her breath. "Kissing you is just going to prove it all the more." Before she could say a word, his lips were on hers.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

_AN: Thanks, Luke's Momma, for the answer to my question. With that, I still don't own anything_!_ Hang in there, remember I am addicted to "happily ever after!"_

Penelope's first thought was, _It's three in the afternoon and someone is kissing me in my office. This is so inappropriate!_

Her second thought was _Holy crap, he's knows what he's doing!_

Alex Monroe kissed like a man who kissed a lot in his life and really liked it. He kissed like he enjoyed that almost as much as making love. It was a work of art, his kisses, meant to draw excitement and passion. But therein the problem laid. This was a nice kiss, a sweet, cappuccino tasting kiss, but there was a lack of … something.

Not that she was going to fuss about it. You didn't turn down kisses like this everyday. She closed her eyes and tried not to think, just to feel. Instead, visions of someone with beautiful dark chocolate eyes and an even more beautiful smile danced like sugarplums in her head. She opened her eyes to look at the beautiful blonde kissing her. Maybe it was because they were talking about Morgan before all this, but she felt nothing.

Nope. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Zero. Nothing.

He gently broke the kiss and looked at her. The expression he gave her was bemused. "That bad, huh?"

She tittered with laughter, and shook her head. "No, no, not really. Sorry. It just.."

"Oh, don't worry," he said, "And for heaven's sake, don't apologize. I was poaching where I didn't belong. I just couldn't help myself. You need to be kissed, and often, Penelope Garcia. But I didn't ask, I shocked you, and I knew someone else was on your mind."

She blushed and looked away. It was kind of an intense thing to hear. The hardest part was, he knew she was thinking about Derek. She was always thinking about Derek. But not this new Derek of the past few months. Unobtainable, unaffectionate, unsmiling, unfriendly Derek.

No, she thought about the Derek that she knew for the past five years. She thought about the Derek who laughed and joked with her and made her hot. The Derek who was there to save her life, the Derek who held her when life got to be too much. The Derek who smiled and lit up a room, not to mention her heart.

The Derek she loved.

No, the new Derek was not like the one she was pining over. Should she spend the rest of her life, waiting for him to return to her, so they could go on being friends while he dated another woman and she dated another man? Or should she give a gorgeous younger man who wanted her, actually _wanted_ her, for more than friendship a chance? She had a decision to make.

She looked at Alex and stood. "Let me be the one to ask this time, Alex," she said, taking a step closer to him, placing her hands behind his neck. "Please, will you kiss me?"

This time was much, much better.

A month later....

Derek had a few papers in his hands as he walked down to Garcia's office. He had some extra work, computer stuff that was beyond him, that she needed to do. He wanted to give these to her so she could start them as soon as she could. He thought while he was there, he would get a chance to maybe talk to her to. Run some stuff that was going in his head by her, so she could help him sort it out.

Really, he just wanted to talk to her again. It was a hellish two months. Agent Monroe was here for a couple of months now, and he had a hell of a time liking that kid. He was so arrogant and cock sure, he had to reign him in constantly. He knew he used to think rashly, but this guy was beyond what he was like. He thought to himself that he should write Hotch a thank you card for putting up with him for all those years that he needed to grow up; he understood Hotch a lot better now that he was in the role.

What he really needed was some stress relief. He needed to talk to his best friend, really talk to her, and let her know how he felt. He wanted her to know he was lonely, that he missed her, and that he was sorry for ignoring her. He had more to say too, but he'd figure it out when he was with her. He barely talked to her for the past couple of months. She seemed preoccupied. He started walking more quickly. He wanted, he needed--

He opened the door and almost fell over. There, in the middle of her den of computers, in the middle of the day, Penelope Garcia was kissing Alex Monroe. Not just a little peck, either. Just about every emotion that he ever felt came rushing to the surface. He was astounded first, then angry, then very angry with a tinge of outrage. The need to punch Alex came to surface, too. But the thing that he felt over everything else? Incredible, overwhelming hurt.

"Garcia," he said. He didn't notice Penelope trying to push Alex away; he just noticed that they were still touching, and he didn't like it.

She stood straight and blushed guiltily at him. "Derek.."

"I need to speak to you in my office, now."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

_AN: Sorry everyone. Huge chapter, but no good place to break it. More coming soon_.

For a minute, Derek and Penelope just stared at each other. They both knew something big was going to happen, something really big, that was going to change their relationship forever. And they were both frozen in that space, almost afraid to take that first step.

"What? You don't want to talk to me?" Alex said, interrupting the moment.

Derek tore his gaze from Penelope and looked at Monroe. Wait a minute- was that little fucker actually _smirking_ at him? He had to use everything in his power not to rearrange Monroe's pretty face. "It's Agent Garcia's office," he growled. "She is responsible for what happens in here."

"I'll say," Alex said with a half grin at Penelope. Derek actually started to sweat, he wanted to punch the man that badly.

"Please, Alex," she said, pleading that he would just shut up and not antagonize Derek. He walked out and she looked at her boss. She tried to see him as just her boss, now. Most of the time, she failed in that miserably. "I'll follow you, sir."

Derek was nearly sputtering with how angry he was. _Sir _again! He was sick to death of Penelope calling him _Sir_. He was tired of being treated like a second class citizen where Garcia was concerned. _Professional, keep it professional_. When the reached his office, he shut the door with a resounding shove and locked it. No one was going to interrupt them. He had a lot to say. Then he turned on her. "I am not going to even start with how inappropriate it is for you to be kissing another agent in the middle of the day," he scowled. "I know you know that.."

She intened to keep this professional, not drag up their past friendship and her past feelings for him. But before Penelope was just mad; now she was furious. Originally, she did feel guilty because she knew that during working hours, she probably shouldn't be kissing anyone. But to hear something was unacceptable from Derek Morgan… that was too much. "You are lecturing me on _impropriety_? Mr. _Baby Girl_? Mr. _look up sexy and brilliant_?"

He just looked at her. "No, I wasn't going to. I was just wondering where the hell your head is at! In the middle of the day; you know better." He was trying, rather unsuccessfully, to douse that hurt he felt. He thought he'd try a diversion. "And what about Lynch? What if he saw?"

She rolled her eyes. "Let me worry about Kevin!" Her anger was up, mostly at herself. Of course it wasn't about him. "Besides, I haven't dated Kevin in over a month! But you don't bother to know anything about me anymore, so this doesn't surprise me."

It was as if two months time vanished. They were facing one other, anger and something else just crackling in the air. Informal, unprofessional, and above all, thinking mostly about each other.

"Oh, no you don't, Baby Girl," he said, shaking his head incredulously. "Don't you try to turn this around and make me feel bad. I'm the one that caught you kissing that damn fool in your office."

"Well, it won't happen again," she said. Then added, "Here."

"You two an item?" he questioned. A muscle was ticking in his cheek, but she didn't see it. She was too busy trying to keep her own control.

"What?" she said, defensively. "Is he too good looking for me, too sexy, too young, too smooth, too suave?"

"Yes," he spat. He meant that Monroe was a player; she deserved better than a player. Looking at her face, he knew she took him completely wrong. She paled immediately and rage was replaced by absolute hurt. He never wanted to hurt her. "Baby girl, I didn't mean--"

She shoved him, and hard. "Don't you ever call me baby girl again!" her eyes were spitting sparks at him, she looked like she was going to ignite. "If you think that I am so unworthy, then I was never anything to you! Not your friend and certainly not your baby girl."

"This is such bullshit," he said, glaring at her. She was standing, her back to his locked door and he took a step closer. "It has nothing to do with your worthiness. You were my best friend for five years; to me, you are _still_ my best friend. So if I am concerned about you being with some suave-ass player, then sue me."

"Yeah, right, real concerned. You've barely talked to me for two months! No nicknames, and you only said 'Hi' in passing," she pouted. She was done hiding the hurt.

"I haven't had time, princess. I got this damn promotion that I didn't ask for, been trying to learn the ropes, keeping us all together, with Hotch gone now. And I needed to be very professional, in case Strauss came by, for the team's sake. It's been hell," he glared down at her. "And you haven't exactly been making it easier!"

"Yes I did! But you ignored me, or ran off with Tamara, or were too busy being the boss. Your office with all the presents, my calls; I tried, Derek," she said, and some of the anger left. She swallowed hard and looked into his angry eyes. Those eyes she loved for so long. "You didn't want me. I missed you so much."

"I missed you. And I wanted you, so badly." he tried to calm back down, but it wasn't working. "But you were always with Monroe. He was chatting with you constantly, flirting with you constantly. Hell, I called and you didn't even know it was me!"

"I was lonely, Derek. I went from being a best friend, to feeling like nothing. He made me hot and happy with his flirting." He scowled at that. She needed to reason with him, she'd had enough of this. She just wanted him back! "I need that passion in my life, Derek. Our flirting, it made me whole and alive; it gave me passion. When Alex came along, he was just there." She looked into his eyes and pleaded that he'd understand. "I'd rather have a substitute than nothing at all."

It hit him hard, what she said. A substitute? Is that what Monroe was, a walking, talking, breathing replicant of himself? He thought of all the things that annoyed him about Alex and knew that there were definately similarities, especially when he was younger. He almost laughed then. He was jealous of what he used to be!

And he thought of the other part more. Feeling _whole_. He hadn't felt whole or alive in a very long time. But, dear God, did he feel alive now! The air absolutely sizzled around them, like someone lit a fuse and the sparks were coming ever so much closer to the powder. He looked into her magnificent brown eyes, dangerously on fire, and the high color in her cheeks. He couldn't stop himself if he tried. He leaned in to whisper just above her lips. "Why have a substitute, when you can have the real thing?"

Then, he did what his mind said he was meant to do; he lowered his lips to hers. And the magic began.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_AN: A bit of stress release, but still more work to do. Hope this is okay…._

The first brush of Derek's lips were gentle, teasing, but even with that, her heart rate started to accelerate. Her body's response was quick and immediate, surging electricity, tingles. It was an epiphany moment: she kissed other men in her life, but she never really kissed anyone until Derek. And just from a quick brush of his lips!

She wondered if he felt it too, because he looked down at her, gave a little smile. She didn't have much time to think anything else, because his lips captured hers again, and the ability to think went right out the door. All she could do was feel. Her head was spinning, she felt boneless.

She'd kissed Kevin Lynch, she'd kissed Alex Monroe, but nothing, nothing was like kissing Derek Morgan. He incited a want in her that she never had with anyone else. Other kisses were pleasant; Derek's made her greedy and demanding. She wanted all of him, and she wanted it now.

He was kissing her like he was starved for her. She kissed him back with a matching intensity, moaning deep, knowing in her heart that this is what passion should feel like. She opened her mouth to dive deeper into this magic kiss. She was clinging hard to his shoulders, holding herself up. He must have sensed she was having a hard time standing. He pushed her against the door, edging a thigh between hers. He broke the kiss, and looked down at her, his gaze hot and needy. Then he kissed her throat where her pulse was fluttering.

"Don't stop.. Oh, Derek.. If you stop," she cried, clutching him even harder, her eyes were closed and her head was leaning back against the door. His hands worked their way up from her ribcage to under her breasts. Her breath caught in her throat as he gently lifted, testing their weight. His thumbs brushed over the hardened peaks. Her eyes flew open, and she gasped. His eyes were locked with hers; there was no mistaking that he was claiming her. He was looking at her with such silent intensity, desire and heat written on his face.

Just then, a knock sounded on the door. "Morgan Are you there?" It was JJ, probably with a case that needed to be looked at. Derek drew a deep breath to control himself, but he wouldn't release Penelope. Not yet. He couldn't, even if he wanted to, he had such need for her.

"Give me fifteen, JJ," he said, his voice a little hoarse. He almost laughed at himself; no amount of time was going to make what he was feeling recede. He leaned forward to brush his lips against hers again, and ended up kissing her hard again. He couldn't get enough of her, her taste, her smell, her softness, the feel of her arousal. God, he was addicted! But he also had a job to do. That stopped him.

What was meant to be a quick kiss to show her he was more than interested in her, that she didn't ever need to look for a substitute, escalated into him nearly screwing the hell out of her against his office door. If JJ didn't knock, he knew he wouldn't have stopped. He was angry at himself for losing that much control. She deserved so much better than that.

Penelope didn't know what to think or what to say. All she knew was that right now, she felt a bit awkward. She was riding her best friend's thigh in his office, after a knock down, drag out fight, and she had begged him to continue. She was a bit mortified. He must have noticed the blush, because he backed away from her a little bit. To give her some room to think, it must have been.

"Penelope," he said. He started smiling, shaking his head a little, that broke into a big grin. "Well-"

She didn't want to hear what he was going to say, that maybe he regretted it, so she quickly interrupted him. "I better go, there's work to do." She turned and started to unlock the door, but his hand on hers stopped it.

"We're not done, baby girl," he said, wrapping his arm around her waist and to pull her flush against his body. He wanted to wash the doubt he saw on her face away. "Not by a long shot."

She could feel the insistent heat of his body, the hardness. It was all too much to take. "I know," she whispered. She took a deep breath and opened the door, exiting his office into the coolness of the hallway, walking past several curious sets of eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

_AN: You folks are amazing me with the reviews. My goodness! I am humbled beyond belief. (and to answer Ebascones: I wish they'd take me; you know who I'd put together!). Okay! I think this is how this is going to go: One sad chapter, one much needed chapter, one romantic chapter, and then we have some fun!! Bear with me, remember- Kricket aka HEA girl..._

Penelope answered her phone without a snappy retort. She was tired, and her head was throbbing. She had been so busy for the past couple of days that she didn't have time to think of anything original to say. She needed to get it together, but that was hard with so much laying out there. Like an unsolved case in her mind, this ached for closure.

There had been no time to talk to Derek before they had to head out on the next case. This was two days ago. Penelope longed for Derek to call her, tell her that what happened in the office wasn't just an apparition on her behalf. She thought about it, thought about the blind need she saw on his face, and it gave her chills and made her want.

And that was just a kiss! Never had she ever wanted anyone like she wanted him. It was a necessity, her heart needed him as much as her body craved him. She could still feel his hands on her, still taste his kisses.

She still worried that he regretted it. She didn't deny that he wanted her. She knew he was as turned on as she was, but he must not have been ready to make that step in their relationship. She challenged him, challenged his prowess by saying she found a substitute, and he did the male thing- showed that he was still the hottest thing out there. She sighed sadly; he never needed to prove that to her.

But in her desire to have him back at all cost, she probably lost his friendship. Now that she had his kiss, she had to face up that having him as a friend was never going to be enough again. He certainly didn't need her as a girlfriend; scads of women chased him around. Thin, gorgeous scads of women. She didn't even know if he was still with Tamara. That thought made her stomach plummet. She couldn't bear him being with Tamara still. Then she realized; she didn't have a choice. She'd take him any way she could. It was bitter tasting- despiration.

She didn't get a chance to ask him either. She tried calling, but his cell was unreachable. He called one time, after midnight, leaving a short message. "Baby girl, I haven't been in cell range all day, and now that I am, it's so late that we can't talk. And we need to talk. I'll catch you when I get back, I promise."

Unfortunately, Alex called a few times a day. Now that she had a taste of "the real thing," talking to Alex was not the same. In fact, it was a little annoying. He tried to flirt, tried to ask her to go out, but she just wasn't interested. She knew she would never be interested in anyone else again. She loved Derek Morgan with all her heart, and she was never going to not love him. Like Alex had said, kissing "just proved it all the more."

She made a decision then, to save her own heart. She would offer a fling, if he wanted it. No strings attached. At least then she'd have some of him, and she would always have the memory that Derek Morgan at one time desired her.

The phone rang and her screen popped up _Monroe, A_. She just was not in the mood to talk to him. But, he was an agent, she had to talk. Plopping her headset on, she hit the button. "Yeah, Alex, what's up?"

"What kind of answer is that, angel face?" he purred, and her skin actually crawled. She couldn't believe she ever thought he was anything like Derek.

"Just tired, Alex. What do you need?"

"Okay, we need the stats on the number of international clinics that you can find in Colorado Springs proper. Not just the listings with "international" in the title, but the ones that have doctors that specialize in international care," he said. "Morgan, anything else?"

Penelope came alert. Derek was there? And he didn't call her, he let Alex do it? Her heart started pounding painfully and tears sprung to her eyes.

"I guess not," Alex said. "Hey, we should be done by this evening, then about three hours flight. Want to paint the town, beautiful?"

"What? Oh, sure, sure," she said, not really paying much attention to what he was saying. Seeing her heart laying on the counter bleeding away made her less conversational. "See you later."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

_AN: This is my "much needed" chapter! (The little shit! You'll know when you read it who I'm talking about!) Here it is. This is for JenRar, in particular. (I hate to think I stabbed her-- I'm a gentle person, really!!)_

Derek was on the plane, about ready to put his headphones on, so he could catch forty winks. He was exhausted. Unfortunately, he worked straight through, traipsing through the damn mountains, without much sleep and no cell service. When he got off the plane, though, he was going straight to Penelope's apartment to surprise her. He had so much to tell her, he needed and wanted so badly to talk.

He was interrupted by Agent Monroe sitting across from him. "I have a hot date tonight."

Morgan just closed his eyes. Ever since the incident in Penelope's office, Monroe was an even bigger pain in his ass, joking about dumb shit and plain ol' bugging him. Earlier today, he was talking to the head investigator in the Springs, going through the profile, and Alex was yelling over something to him. He just glared over at him; you don't interrupt when someone's giving the profile. Ever.

He tried to be somewhat personable. "Good for you."

"Heck, yeah. Now that I have nothing to worry about," he said, cryptically enough that Derek opened one eye to look at him. "You know, I used to think she was always going to be in love with you, but she jumped at the chance to go out tonight." The triumphant, smug expression on Alex's face didn't last long.

One minute, Derek was leaning back, looking slumberous with his headphones on, the next minute he had Monroe's throat in his hand. "If you valued your life, you would leave Penelope alone," he said, his eyes snapping. He was deathly quiet, so that no other agents woke up and saw him. "Or are you really that stupid?"

Alex tried to pry Derek's hand off his throat and couldn't do it. He either underestimated how strong the other man was, or he _really_ ticked him off. He really liked Morgan, he reminded him of a lot of his pals. They were similar in nature. He teased the hell out of him, because he needed to lighten up. He meant it just to be a pissing match between two players for one pretty girl, like he would have with his buddies from college. It was just fun to see who got the girl, some testosterone fueled fun.

But he miscalculated; made a very big, practically fatal, error. Agent Morgan was in love with the girl. He had his doubts before. After all, he was dating another woman for awhile, and he never saw him really flirt with Penelope since he was there. It was actually when Alex flirted with her that the other agents kind of explained that there was something there between Morgan and Garcia.

"What something?" he asked, more than a little confused.

"Don't ask!" Rossi had told him with a laugh.

"Morgan," he gasped. "I get it. I'm done. She's yours." Morgan released him, but the propensity for violence was still there. Alex actually laughed at the glowering older agent. "Shit, I meant for it just to be fun, man. Why didn't you tell me she really was yours? I would've backed off."

"Penelope wasn't a toy for you to play with, you little asshole," he said, continuing to scowl. "She's the most genuine, truly beautiful-"

"You don't have to tell me that! Originally, it started off: flirt with the flirter. Then I heard you were in on the action too, so I thought, 'Hey, game on,'" he looked at Derek and spread him hands in front of him. "I never would have hurt her, I actually liked her and could easily fall in love with her. She's that kind of woman, so sensual and-"

"Don't make me hurt you," Derek said, interrupting him again.

"Man," Alex said, giving a low whistle, standing up to move away. "You got it bad. You should've just said you were in love with her, and I wouldn't have even tried to poach. I thought she was fair game. Hell, she didn't even know it when she talked to me." This time, Alex did the glaring. "You ARE going to tell her, once this fucking plane lands, right?"

Derek actually smiled up at the younger man. It was a big Morgan grin that the kid reflected. In that moment, Derek felt mighty young, and mighty stupid. "Yeah." He certainly did have a lot to talk about when he returned to Quantico. He leaned back, slid on his headphones, and slept with a smile on his face.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 8

_AN: I dedicate this HEA to AbbyGibis; Abby, dreams do come true, especially for wonderful reviewers like you! :D Kricket_

_For everyone else, I couldn't wait! Here's to Happily Ever After...._

The doorbell rang, and Penelope seriously did not want to answer it. She had her robe on, not a stitch of makeup, her hair was messy; she was not going out with Alex Monroe, not if he paid her to. She tried to call him, over and over, to tell him that she was not in the mood, not at all, for this date.

She was so in love with Derek. _God, to be in love really sucks! _she thought. She loved him before, but now, after that damn kiss, she couldn't think of anything _but_ him. Sleep didn't even help; she dreamt about him, too.

Her heart was so damn sore, she couldn't imagine having to sit through a dinner with that cocky, suave idiot. She felt bad thinking it; really, he was very nice. He just wasn't at all who she wanted to be with. Try as he might, there was no comparison. After all, she tried the substitute approach before, and found it extremely lacking.

But, the stinker would not pick up his phone. Maybe he could tell that she was going to cancel or something, but he just refused to answer. It went through to voice mail, so she knew it was ringing. He always said before the three times they went out how much he liked it when she was all dolled up.

_Well, buster, you're getting a surprise tonight!_, she thought viciously as she threw the door open. "Alex, I am not…" her voice trailed completely off when she saw Derek Morgan standing in her doorway. He was holding an absurd amount of red roses and had the best, most beautiful trademark Morgan grin on his face. Years later, she would look back and think that her reaction was comical, but right now, her heart hurt too much to go through anything more with him.

Derek's first thought was that she looked beautiful, her eyes sparking fire, her full lips pouting, her long legs peeking though the bottom of her robe. Then he saw it coming. She was originally mad as hell when she opened the door, then shocked, then smiling at the roses…. Then she burst into tears.

Derek tossed the roses onto the floor, scooped her up and carried her quickly to the couch, sitting her on his lap. "Penelope, sweetheart, it's okay, I'm here," he cooed, holding her and rocking a little. "Baby girl, shhh, listen…"

She sat for a minute, enjoying the feel of him, his wonderful smell. Then she pushed away from him a little bit. "No! I'm not going to listen. First, we fight- I almost lost you! -then you kiss me like I've always dreamt of being kissed."

He grinned at her, which was probably inappropriate, but he didn't care. "That was one helluva kiss."

She frowned back at him. "Then you don't call for two whole days, and when I finally get in contact with the team, you let _Alex_ call for you. _Alex! _Of all the people!"

She was cute when she was indignant, he thought, then brought his head back into the game. He was a man in love; it was hard to be upset about anything. "Baby Girl, I was in the mountains for those days. I didn't have cell signal forever. When I finally did, I called, but it was too damn late in the day. And Alex-"

She tightened her tried to get off his lap. "What about Alex?" she growled.

"No no, don't move. Scootch on over closer," he said, pulling her more solidly onto his lap. She was practically pinned to him, but she was too upset to notice. He looked down into her face, and placed a little kiss on her lips. Understandably, she was very quiet now.

"Now where was I?" He smiled again, adjusting her even closer. "Oh yes, dumb-fuck Alex has a Bluetooth headset. This is his new toy that he insists on using. We all just decided to let him have his way; he does the calls. It was better than listening to him whine about it."

"But Derek, when he called from Colorado Springs, you knew he was talking to me," she sounded so sad, she broke his heart. "You didn't even bother to say anything to me, to give me some hope. You were in the same room, when he set up the date-"

_That little shit. I am going to get him for this, _he thought. "Penelope, I was in the same precinct, not the same room. About a hundred people in between. I was no where near that fool. I was briefing before I went into the mountains. It was a hurry up case, time was of the essence. I'm the lead, honey. I would've called, if I could."

Slowly, all of it started to digest. What he was saying, the roses, his warm and comfy lap. Then she noticed; his warm, comfy, aroused lap. He was here, and he was here for a purpose. And not just to be her friend. "Oh."

"Oh?" he said. He smiled. Enough wasting time; he had some talking to do. "You've been my best friend; without you, life is so damn lonely. But when we kissed," he looked at her mouth and couldn't help but kiss her again, softly and deeply. He rested his cheek against the top of her head. "When we kissed, I knew I wanted much more."

Her heart sank a little. He was ready to give up their friendship, because she pushed him for sex. It all seemed surreal, he couldn't really want her the way that she wanted him to. "Derek, do you want a fling?"

"Of course," he said. "One that lasts about fifty years. Baby Girl, I love you. I think I loved you for a very long time. When I got this promotion, I started to lose myself; being with you, I found me again. I became whole again. Without you, I'm an empty half. I think you feel the same?"

She just nodded. Then she smiled, "Yes, of course I do. I love you and I've really missed you."

He leaned over to kiss the pulse in her neck. "I need you like I need air, Penelope. We both need each other," he murmured against the smooth column.

She leaned her head back to give him better access. "Now you're talking, Hot Stuff."

He smiled wickedly at her. "Baby girl, let's celebrate."

"Oh, sure," she said, shifting to get up off that fantastic lap of his. "I just have to get dressed-"

"Nope," he said, lifting her up in his arms again. "I was thinking of getting you undressed." Her slippers fell off in the hallway as he carried her to her room.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10- The epilogue chapter

_AN: Here comes an epilogue, because I just think they are fun to write! And I think anything angst-ridden needs some fluff, short and sweet….Sorry I misnumbered the last chapter- I don't know how to go in and fix it!_

On an average Saturday outside the Morgan house, this is what could be heard:

"Oooh, higher! Oh my God, Derek, right there. Yes!" she moaned and groaned in ecstasy. She was so happy, she was shivering. It was heaven, true heaven, bliss. Then again, his touch always was magic to her.

"Baby girl," he groaned, continuing to scratch the perfect spot in the middle of her back. "Keep moaning like that and you're going to get what you're asking for."

She turned in his arms and smiled, looping her hands around his neck. "Really?" she said, arching a brow at him. She pressed her body against his, smiling before raising her lips to whisper near his ear, "Oooh, Derek, right there…"

He smiled a little half smile at her. "Tease," he murmured against her lips, before capturing them and taking the kiss so many stages higher than she ever could. Ever since that first kiss, her whole body reacted with instantaneous magic. Immediately, she started to tingle, little fantastic shocks that curled her toes and made her ache for more.

What started off as teasing between the two of them quickly escalated. Derek's hands slid down her back to cup her bottom, pulling her closer. He deepened the kiss, before working his way down her neck. He was slow and deliberate; she was greedy and begging for him to go faster.

Her begging never worked. He was going to continue her sensual torture for as long as he felt was necessary. Not that she truly minded; he was fantastic and she knew she was damn lucky. It was an awesome ride: she'd hang on tight before letting go.

By the time he got to her ear, his hands that were on her bottom lifted her a little. He pressed his hips even closer to hers, in a gentle grind. "Woman, what you do to me…" he growled against her ear, nibbling lightly. This time, the shivers were for an entirely different reason.

"The same thing you do to me," she said, looking up at him with big, passion-darkened eyes. He loved that look, the look of utter surrender and anticipation. He thought that she was the finest woman that ever existed, and counted his blessings that she was his. He smiled a wicked grin at her, before making quick work of the rest of their clothes.

His breath caught a little in his throat before cupping his hands lightly over her breasts, staying for a moment there, rubbing his thumbs over her perfect ruched peaks. Before he got too distracted, he continued moving to her back to draw her closer. He kissed her again, enough to make her dizzy with want. She reached her arms around him and held him closer.

Nothing was better than that feeling, bare skin against bare skin. She just held on to him for a moment, letting it soak in and warm her soul. It was a such a blessing, having him hold her, and for her to be able to hold him back. It was an extraordinary and unique feeling; there was no substitute.

And so, in the middle of their sunshine filled bedroom, they continued to make this a very, very good day.


End file.
